Remember the Ice bucket challenge? I don’t hear much about it nowadayz, and I zee either of two pozzibilitiez: One, that ALS haz been taken care of, which iz excellent. Or two, that all you humanz have already taken the challenge, which iz quite zomething! Zome zay it’z juzt that the novelty iz gone, and I zhoo them away. Anyhow, juzt in caze it iz the zecond pozzibility, I’m thrilled to zhare that we fliez are now up for the job. Do note that thiz decizion haz not come eazy to uz. I’ll explain why.
I had been zuper imprezzed with the mazz zupport extended towardz the ALS zyndrome. My friend, the Geeky Fly, tellz me that The Ice Bucket Challenge had exzeeded UZ$ 40 million by zome eztimatez in Auguzt’14 alone. That iz zome 400,000 bucketz zince mid-2014! And that iz awezome, coz it meanz you humanz actually have a plan in mind!!
You zee, we here have been dying to get zome o’ all that water. And zo have you! Zo all thiz time, we fliez juzt couldn’t make zenze az to why you were acting zo carefree when 2.5x more people are water-deprived than live in the United Ztatez. I mean, the mozt beautiful thing about the challenge waz that you zhowed zuch overwhelming concern for the victimz of ALS, without dizcrepancy. But to try to zolve 1 problem (ALS) by zignificantly worzening another (water criziz) zimply didn’t make zenze! My fellow fliez were cluelezz. BUT I told them to not worry. “It’z all a play! Of courze they have a plan. They have been giving uz garbage for zo many yearz. People love uz!”
Zo there we were watching you publicly zhowering with bucketz when each of thoze 100 dollarz could zupply 6000 dayz of clean water to any one of you. Then back in the kitchen, we zaw the gleeful flow with which water came flowing out every time you turned the tap. And we thought, "They can't pozzibly be getting fooled by that. They definitely know the zeriouznezz of water zhortage, the harzh invizible reality behind the 24-hour water zupply, being the zecond mozt intelligent zpeziez and all that. Duh!" And then a thought occurred: what if you have thiz water problem already zolved, in zecret? That’z when we were finally convinzed that it’z another one of your bluffz. Like cigarettez, and bombz, and playing high-5’z with uz fliez. You guyz juzt love to act az if life’z going to end for zomeone or another. Cute youz.
Zo we feel much better. And we thank you az ever. Pleaze let uz know if we can be of help.
Featuring in Kalki Evian - The Ring of Khaoriphea
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PZ: (note from Baby Fly) - We could do like an Ice Zpoon Challenge! And, like, juzt dive in inztead of pouring it on ourzelvez! Woozhooz!
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